Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Akbar, Birbal And Facebook (Bad combination,Great Confusion) Part - 1

"Hey Birbal, What you are doing with my Tablet for last half an hour?" asked Akbar. 

Birbal replied "Jahanpanah, I am creating your Facebook account".

Now what the hell is this Facebook? akbar asked

Birbal said, Jahanpanah, it is a kingdom networking site. Here you could keep a track on your "NaamaKool notorious Salim", I had already sent him the friend request. Not only this...............after a pause birbal whispered in Akbar's ears, "You can watch sunny Leone's hot videos too which Bairam Khan used to share shamelessly on Facebook. And one more thing, I liked the page of 'Khabar Din Bhar' on your behalf. Now there is no need of these useless khabaris who charges 50 gold coins just for telling you that "Whose dog peed on your Bed?"

"That's awesome but who told you about the Leone's stuff" akbar asked shyly. :D

"You never deletes your history.Give thank to god 'Din-e-Illahi' that your Tab didn't got the hands of Jodha otherwise you could be kicked out from your own kingdom" Birbal replied and Akbar started looking around him in order to ensure that nobody else heard it.

Time for a good Profile picture, so that people, who may know you, could recognize you, continued Birbal.

Akbar's voice went hoarse this time, Everyone knows me,I don't need a profile picture.

Birbal replied softly "Jahnpanah, few years ago you had stopped me from uploading your photo on shadi.com which kept you bachelor for years" (Although it's other thing that response was even more pathetic when photos were uploaded, birbal murmurs in his mind).

"Call shahi photographer" ordered Akbar. 

Cameraman came,photos got clicked,many of them,one after the other. Akbar tried every position,every style that his Zameer allowing him but photos that came didn't seemed to deserve even a single 'like' or 'comment'. 

Birbal thought "It is a big problem and if Akbar came to know that photos of  'Salim','Jodha' and his other rivals yielding over 100 likes and his photo had none, he may kill this poor photographer".

Finally a photo came out of shutterbug that had less bugs than others. Birbal uploaded the photograph after getting nod from Akbar. 

So jahanpanah, your profile is ready. Your login id is "akbar34@mughal.com" and password......birbal whispered "Ashutosh Gowarikar mast hai". Akbar noted both on a piece of paper and kept with him. 

A beep came after a shortwhile, the tablet was still in hands of Birbal. It was the first notification on Akbar's FB account.

"Maharana Pratap Singh (The Mughal Hater) commented on a photo of you.

Anxious birbal opened the photo. The comment reads :-

" LOLZ.............hahahahahahaha............Funny Face.............:D "

Birbal deleted the comment as soon as he read and liked the very same photo with a comment, "Nice Jhanpanah, You looking good".

Soon a second comment came from Maharana Pratap, 

"Hahahahahha...........Birbal,I must say......get your eyes cheaked.". 

Birbal deleted it too and feared that what would happen if Akbar read those type of  comments.

Akbar got irritated as his Tab was still lying in hands of Birbal and ordered, "Birbal, you had done what you had to do so now return my Tab".

Birbal nodded and returned it.

A broad smile came on the face of Akbar after looking at his profile. Birbal couldn't being able to figure out the exact reason behind the Akbar's smile and thought,it might be for the sense of advancement which Akbar is having after entering into the family of 'Zukerburg'.

Finally Birbal gave him the Sutra of sefety on Fb,"Like as many photos as you can,only then people would like yours.Don't click 'like','share' or 'comment' on any Leone's video no matter how much you'd liked them. Send friend request only to those you know, and don't call unwanted problems by flirting with queens of other Kingdom on chat and commenting irresponsibly on their photos like 'Mast lag rhi hai', 'Ati sundar mann mohini' etc. etc. Don't accept friend request of 'Jodha', it can curb your rights of enjoying independently even on FB".

Birbal left the 'Darbaar' leaving behind Akbar and his new account.

More on Tales of Akbar,Birbal and facebook in my next post.......Till then bbyee......:) 


  1. hahaha. enjoyed the read. would love to know what happens next. so, quickly write that part II

  2. Thanxx deb......evn i don't knw what to write in next segment....I will try...:)

  3. Lol !!! enjoyed reading :)

    1. Oh thanks....well this wasn't the post I was interested in writing but still wrote to keep my blog breathing..:)

  4. if this is truly ur innovation, den a nice start i wud say!

  5. Thank You so much alpa di......and everything here on my blog is original, be sure....:) Good to have your comment here...:)

  6. Such a marvelous writer you are. . .i can't even imagine. . . :) :) and alpa i m sure he would replace Chetan Bhagat one day :D :D

    1. Ye to yar kucch jyadaa hi ho gya....:D Waise I would love to..;)


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